Jeff's Reviews

Thoughts on every movie I've ever seen.

recent product reviews

Thirteen Lives (2022)

Good companion piece to The Rescue. This one’s basically the same, only with a bit of Hollywood polish. Beautifully shot. The cave scenes were surely hard to shoot and so claustrophobic that they’re hard to watch. Viggo and Colin, both playing low-key simpletons, do a nice job with the accents…

Full Review

Police Academy 2: Their First Assignment (1985)

Not good. The formula barely worked for the first film, now it’s totally done. Guttenberg is still painfully unfunny. In retrospect, it’s hard to believe Bobcat made a career of this schtick.

Full Review

Police Academy (1984)

I guess it’s an original storyline, but the comedy is very lowbrow, even for the 80’s. Steve Guttenberg is painfully unfunny and uncharming.

Full Review

Mooned (2023)

Not very clever.

Full Review

Migration (2023)

Animation is nice, but there’s nothing particularly funny or touching or clever about this one.

Full Review

The Boy and the Heron (2023)

The beautiful Miyazaki animation and Hisaishi score that we’ve come to know and love, but this one was totally weird. Many moments during the story when I had no idea what was going on.

Full Review

Leave the World Behind (2023)

A slow, creepy, suspenseful build that feels like a Shyamalan or Peele production. But the reveal is excruciatingly slow, and despite the promise early on, the payoff is not there in the end. Great cast. Roberts exudes tension and discomfort beautifully. How has Ethan Hawke never been pressured to fix…

Full Review

The Occupation of the American Mind (2016)

The film is neatly set up by the steady and surprisingly articulate voice of Roger Waters, but it does not fairly explore complicated history and motivations from both sides. The one-sided arguments are manipulative and dangerous, and overlaying everything with a eerie, droning score in a minor key makes me…

Full Review

Napoleon (2023)

It’s really hard to care about Napoleon or anything he does when he has no redeeming qualities. He’s selfish, egotistical, and pursues unhealthy relationships with broken people. A main character you don’t want to root for is going to be the biggest flaw of any film. Phoenix has turned in…

Full Review

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem (2023)

Decent. Most impressive is the animation. Blows me away how they achieve this semi-realistic but totally animated effect. Chan and Ice Cube’s voices are the most distinctive and enjoyable. Everyone else’s voice performances are ordinary.

Full Review