Jeff's Reviews

Thoughts on every movie I've ever seen.

Road House (2024)

Directed by Doug Liman

Starring Jake Gyllenhaal, Conor McGregor, Daniela Melchior

Author

A loose remake of the original, and there’s nothing good here. Unimpressive story, casting, acting, characters, dialogue. This is just popcorn violence, though the fights are well-shot.

I like Gyllenhaal, and he’s got some impressive muscles, but with a goofy grin and awkward hesitation before delivering each line of dialogue, he’s detached and sterile and strange. There’s no chemistry with any of the other characters, and he certainly isn’t someone we can connect with as a viewer. None of the charm and charisma of Swayze’s Dalton. Gyllenhaal is better off playing weirdos.

The other characters are just as awkward. Ellie is gorgeous, but no explanation is given for why she and her father, both seemingly born and raised in Glass Key, have such exotic accents. Charlie is straight-up weird, not take-you-home-with-me adorable, which is what I think her character needed. The over-the-topness from McGregor is the thing I enjoyed most about this movie.

In American tourist hotspots in 2024, are there really bars like this? Where brawls are tolerated, police don’t care, and the band keeps playing when all hell breaks loose? Why is no one able to use a gun effectively?

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