Princess Mononoke (1997)
Wonderful, magical story, very well-told. Beautiful animation, fabulous music, great characters. The Spirit of the Forest was captivating, and the Kidoma were eerily cute. Ashitaka looked like Speed Racer. So who was Princess Mononoke? Why did San wear human jewelery like earrings and a necklace? And did that long shot…
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U2: The Best of 1990-2000 (2002)
Not a story, but a neat selection of videos and documentaries. Lots of videos I’ve never seen before.
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The Great Train Robbery (1903)
Decent story. Cool hand-painted clothing. The first close-up.
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Häxan: Witchcraft Through the Ages (1922)
A documentary/fairy tale/horror/psychoanalysis. Some cool stop-motion effects, and a fat-ass Satan (played by the director) with a wiggly tongue. Nice jacking off metaphor. I think John Wayne was the narrator for some parts of it. I was very sleepy when we saw this movie in class, and I must confess…
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It (1927)
Sexy Clara Bow was definitely a hottie. Great eyes. And a self-proclaimed nymphomaniac. If not for Drew Casper, I wouldn’t know that she slept with the entire USC football team. And she was quite a swimmer, too. An interesting social comment on single parenthood. Nice “Popeye” theme on the sailboat.…
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Duck Soup (1933)
Pretty silly overall. There are a few funny moments (the mirror scene was great), but much of the comedy is stale. Most of the gags you can see coming a mile away. The musical interludes were gay. Groucho isn’t a very good actor. He reminds me of Jeff Schneider. He…
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Casablanca (1942)
Nice story. Seems like The English Patient (or the novel it was based on) might have drawn from it. Good use of Sam’s music. Neat how it jumps outside the scene and into the score. May have been the first film to do that. Fantastic cast and good acting. Bogart…
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Sunset Blvd. (1950)
This movie was a surprise coming out of the black and white era of motion pictures. Most pictures out of that era strive for perfection and perfect endings, but this movie showed glimpses of intentional imperfection and a look at the real world of Hollywood. The movie was very pure…
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L’avventura (1960)
Not much of an adventure at all. Once again, any movie that I find myself trying to sleep though can’t get that high a rating. I am a firm believer that film should indeed be realized as an art form, but it must also be at least entertaining enough to…
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Persona (1966)
Interesting beginning sequence of shots. However, I don’t understand what makes that so “cool” among film critics. What defines talent in that area? I think I could put together a series of random images (or those which convey a common theme) just as interestingly as Bergman did, if not more…
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Fiddler on the Roof (1971)
A film about the degradation of Jewish tradition by more modern ideals. A very Jewish film. The long take with the fiddler with the title graphics was pretty cool, and so were those freeze frame and distanced conversations with himself. The whole “why is God playing bad jokes on me”…
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Saturday Night Fever (1977)
Travolta used to be cool. I think they should have had a better looking girl for the lead opposite Travolta. Did they think she was pretty at the time? A film with style. What happened to the shot I have seen with Travolta in his white suit doing his finger-pointing…
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Oh Heavenly Dog (1980)
The dog did some amazing tricks, but the story was a bit long and slow. A bit more comedy and it might have been good.
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Tootsie (1982)
I wanted to rank this film a little lower because the film’s popularity as an American classic prompted me to expect a masterpiece, but then I looked at the film objectively, as if I was the only one who saw it, and decided that this was actually a pretty good…
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The Breakfast Club (1985)
Hilarious and touching, a typical John Hughes film. Great acting by all of them, including the principal. Great dialogue.
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The Fly (1986)
A well-made film. Good suspense, and great use of sound, especially when he first appears as the fly. A cross between Frankenstein, Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde and Beauty and the Beast. Many logical flaws. How come there is no DNA fusion with the zillions of microbes in the teleporter…
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Planes, Trains & Automobiles (1987)
Damn hilarious. Two really funny guys, and a touching story. Great cast, complete with a few of Hughes’ personal troupe. Hughes has a knack for portraying humor as a part of everyday life, and not as the norm. A few of the scenes were copied from Hughes’ earlier work, National…
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The Abyss (1989)
Epic in length, especially in the Special Edition. It starts off slow but improves as it goes, eventually feeling like two separate movies—one about Coffey’s descent into madness and another about the aliens. All the trademarks of a James Cameron film on display: blue-collar heroes, a strong female lead, dorky…
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Say Anything (1989)
A pretty cute 80’s movie. Kinda goofy but kinda charming. Cusack is good. He’s pretty funny, kinda charming, and got some cool lips and eyes. So was the guy who played the father.
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Mermaids (1990)
Winona Ryder has that same attractive cuteness that Meg Ryan has. This movie was actually pretty funny. Not a comedy, but quite a few funny moments.
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Like Water for Chocolate (1992)
A really well-prepared and powerful piece, very faithful to the novel it was adapted from. This movie further backs my claim that film is such a more vivid and enjoyable art form than the books they come from (unless the movie is sloppy and unrealistic). Lots of music, almost too…
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Unforgiven (1992)
Slow. Not too much of a story, hardly any conflict. Throwing morals out the window in a vengeant fury is a rather unconventional resolution. Comedy is unfunny and overdone. The horse-falling gets old. The cowboy who can’t see is good for a few laughs, but that’s it. Nice Lethal Weapon/Malcolm…
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Jurassic Park (1993)
Saved by its special effects, which were undoubtedly awesome. The acting was horribly corny, which could be attributed to the story which itself was at most decent, bordering stupid at some points in the movie.
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Clear and Present Danger (1994)
This movie was quite long, but good enough to support its length. The movie was pretty unspectacular as a whole, except for one great shootout scene with a row of white trucks. The only thing I really hold against this movie is that it is just another in a long…
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Junior (1994)
Cute, but I was expecting something a little funnier. Is it me, or is Arnie starting to show some subtle signs of aging?
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Star Trek: Generations (1994)
A pretty interesting story (a lot like an episode of “Quantum Leap”), if not a bit confusing at times, and a nice addition to the “Star Trek” saga. I think the final few seconds could have used more punch, though, rather than ending like a TV episode. The special effects…
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Apollo 13 (1995)
Good movie with great special effects. It played almost more like a documentary than a story.
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French Kiss (1995)
A silly, little road comedy. Good date movie. Meg Ryan is Meg Ryan. Everyone knows she’s very cute, but she’s got wonderful control of her eyes. She does this furrowed brow thing whenever she’s confused or overwhelmed (which Kristen Stewart tries to do without much success). Kline’s has marvelous expressions…
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Se7en (1995)
A build from confusion to a great finish. Might have been even more horrific if it was her fetus rather than her head in the box at the end. Fincher proves to be quite a talent at a young age. Lots of style and polish in this one. Visual style…
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The Birdcage (1996)
Pretty dumb. Pretty stupid story for film, which I guess could be attributed to the fact that it came from a play. Lane did a great job, especially considering the fact that he is straight in real life.
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Sling Blade (1996)
Pretty good story and pretty good writing. Touching. The baby story was gross but kinda touching in a weird way. Some good comedy, but I think the film needed more of it. Karl telling his joke was pretty funny, and so was the football. I think it would have been…
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Contact (1997)
I’ve always felt that Hollywood sorely needed a film which intelligently and realistically dealt with the possibility of the discovery of extra-terrestrial life. The only other films which take extra-terrestrial contact seriously are War of the Worlds and The Day the Earth Stood Still. Sure, Spielberg made E.T. and Close…
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Mr. Nice Guy (1997)
Jackie is just so darn goofy. Same appeal as Schwarzenegger, I think. That chick’s athleticism was awesome. I have been waiting a long time for a truly athletic and beautiful chick to make it big in Hollywood action movies. Could she be the one? Lots of 80’s elements. The slo-mo…
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City of Angels (1998)
Hollywoodized, but not ruined, version of Wings of Desire. There IS some magic there. The dialogue seems awkwardly poetic at times, as if it was translated from the original German word for word, but all in all it’s a pretty solid movie. I question some of the story. I don’t…
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Out of Sight (1998)
Reminded me a lot of U-Turn. It had the same kind of whimsical story, characters, intelligent black humor, editing, pace, and camerawork. Only U-Turn was a bit more “experimental” and said that life is bad, and this one was a little more sane and said that life is good. What…
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Very Bad Things (1998)
Really, really dark comedy, probably the darkest I’ve seen. Very funny. I have never seen someone get hit by a car so hard and so squarely. There were a few times when it got a bit silly, but it always recovered. I just love the comedy of victimization, the joy…
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eXistenZ (1999)
Very strange, very gross, but kinda interesting. Kinda like Quantum Leap. One of those movies where you leave the theater looking at things a bit differently for a few minutes. Cronenberg certainly has a thing for mutations and deformities.
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Pushing Tin (1999)
I liked the romantic comedy and dramatic aspects of it, and I think the actors did a great job with their characters. Good drama, great awkward situations, and a few really funny moments. It just seemed like the air traffic controller bit was kinda forced into the story, almost interfering…
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Animatrix (2003)
Some segments are very faithful to the script (perhaps even more faithful than the Wazchowski’s own Matrix sequels) and artfully animated. Others are missing something.
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Un Chien Andalou (1929)
That eye-cutting is nasty. And that bleeding donkey head gives the film part-membership in the Cattle Mutilation Club. A guest appearance by the Silence of the Lambs moth.
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Invisible Man (1933)
Fantastic effects. Reminded me of Memoirs of an Invisible Man. That young girl was a horrible actress.
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Ossessione (1943)
It’s interesting that the Italian physical ideals of the time had very little to do with the body and had more to do with the face. The main character is actually pretty cool, almost a cross between Mickey Rourke and Elvis, but he’s a bit goofy at times, probably cuz…
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Los Olvidados (1950)
There is very little of a story, just enough to keep my interest hanging by a thread. What there is of a story is almost totally uninteresting, and the way in which it is presented is even worse. It was very cheaply made. One could blame this on the fact…
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Primary (1960)
Nice behind the scenes look at popular historical figures. The lack of narration is refreshing. They used some Kennedy footage twice, and I don’t think it worked. Strange how it begins and ends with Hubert. Not sure about the end. No payoff or resolution?
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Bonnie and Clyde (1967)
Exactly like a 60’s melding of True Romance (how about that “she’s a peach” quote) and Natural Born Killers. The film emphasizes the trashiness, recklessness, and public worship of Mickey and Mallory while at the same time providing the same kind of relationship as Clarence and Alabama. Crazy shooting scene…
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Deliverance (1972)
Spooky. A horror movie in a way, and one of the better horror movies of it’s time. A truly humbling experience. The “Duelling Banjos” scene was great. I like banjos! That inbred kid was really damn freaky. And the tension in the rape scene was really great, too. Voight was…
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Star Wars (1977)
No wonder it’s a trilogy. The ending seemed like it was only the beginning. The entire two hours of this movie seemed like it could have been the first half hour of any other movie. What happens in the film? Not a whole lot. Lucas seems more interested in creating…
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Raging Bull (1980)
Apparently too deep for me, because I didn’t think it was that great. The beginning of a great partnership between De Niro and Pesci. A lot like Casino. Same characters (De Niro and Pesci). Same love triangle between De Niro, his beautiful wife, and Pesci.
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Tron (1982)
One of many films, like WarGames, in the early 80’s which were leery of the computer revolution that was just beginning. We should have spent more time inside the computer. Fascinating world. Scary! Felt a lot like Metropolis, and a lot like THX 1138. And in reality, it felt a…
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The Color Purple (1985)
A classic Spielberg family story with Spielberg photography and music. Some heart-wrenching moments, but the plot holes (which are apparently cleared up in the book I didn’t read) really mess things up. Kind of refreshing to see Blacks being mean to each other rather than the more typical Whites vs.…
Full ReviewHighlander (Director’s Cut) (1986)
Why MacLeod? Why is he chosen to be immortal? Why is anyone chosen? And who chooses? Why did MacLeod and Brenda decide to kiss and screw right after MacLeod reveals that he’s immortal and stabs himself? I don’t get it. Lambert does a decent job. That accent just irritates me.…
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The Running Man (1987)
Not one of Arnold’s best. He’s still good, though. Neat seeing Richard Dawson.
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Back to the Future Part II (1989)
Zemeckis tackles potentially confusing subject matter with ease. Story, characters, effects, and attention to detail are all superb.
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Sea of Love (1989)
Pretty good. Fabulous cast. Pacino is great. I think the movie would have done a little better with a darker, less sappy title. I managed to avoid the film for a few years just because I thought it would be a cheesy love story.
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Miller’s Crossing (1990)
Obviously modelled after the noir gangster films of the 40’s, with 90’s gore. It kinda felt like a Cohn film (strong characters, violin and flute music which sounded a lot like Fargo, photography of nature, photography with subtle comedy), but it was awfully boring. Cohn films are usually refreshingly and…
Full ReviewDaughters of the Dust (1992)
Hard to give this film a rating. There are lots of really good things, but there are lots of really bad things. Like Orlando, this film features some beautiful photography and good use of sound and music, but in this film it gets old very quickly. The music was very…
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White Men Can’t Jump (1992)
Good story, great characters, great dialogue with some nice repeating references. Nice “dog’s ass” comment. Funny and well-made. Great basketball footage. Fun to watch. In some scenes, Wesley’s eyes are super-bloodshot, but he was great anyway. This film and Major League were his two best performances, and he was almost…
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Menace II Society (1993)
Edging toward a higher rating because I really did start to like the protagonist by the end. More of a transformation from bad to good would have been more dramatic. Nice child on the porch connection. Very touching ending with the protagonist covering the kid. The suspense is very well-done.…
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Clerks (1994)
Not too funny as a whole, but it had its moments, providing a really good glimpse into the characters. Acting wasn’t great, but it was pretty good for non-professionals. And for such a low-budget film, it wasn’t that bad.
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Legends of the Fall (1994)
Good characters and some pretty interesting philisophical messages. Aidan was good.
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Stargate (1994)
Cool special effects gone to waste. It’s a lot like Speed in that such amazing resources got wasted on a crappy film. Bad acting, and a bad portrayal of human emotion had such an event really occurred.
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Babe (1995)
A little silly for an adult movie, and a little gruesome for a kids movie. Pretty silly all-around, with a few funny parts. Date: Stephanie.
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Friday (1995)
Cheap production. It had its moments. Tucker was a hilarious character. Tragic story, though.
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Showgirls (1995)
A pretty crappy movie. Pretty crappy acting. It’s basically soft-porn, and that’s how it will make its money. Not dramatic enough for a drama, not erotic enough for a porno.
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Bound (1996)
Great story, great direction (a lot of great shots), good characters and performances, with a little artsy temporal disjunction thown in for good measure. Great use of music, both in song and in score. Takes place over only 2-3 days, but still seems rushed. What if the movie was about…
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Independence Day (1996)
An awful lot of hype. In an attempt to be the king of all movies, they mix genres (romance, sci-fi, and drama). It fails miserably. Kinda fun to watch. Amazing effects. I’m surprised that a big movie like this (one that deals with aliens at least semi-seriously) hadn’t really been…
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Star Trek: First Contact (1996)
Pretty good. Same “technology of the future fights back against humans of the past” story as Terminator. Ties together the Star Trek story and Earth reality quite nicely. Amazing effects, at least on par with Independence Day. But I don’t know about the introductory credits. not only were they long…
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The Devil’s Advocate (1997)
Scary! The scariest movie I’ve seen in a long time. A cross between Rosemary’s Baby, The Firm, and Star Wars. Satan’s got a great sense of humor! Pacino’s still got it. He’ll do just fine if he just keeps selecting good projects like this one. Keanu is stale at times…
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Operation Condor (1991)
Jackie Chan meets Indiana Jones. Some good moves and some cheesy dubbing, typical of these movies.
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Pi (1998)
Pretty interesting, engaging at times. That 216/self-awareness/God thing was a bit hard to swallow, but the rest was pretty good. What was the point of the movie? A call to appreciate life as it is rather than to try defining it? Like most student or cheap indie films, sloppy (or…
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What Dreams May Come (1998)
A bit disjointed. Flashbacks of normal life from a strange environment, like A Thin Red Line. Same alternate reality thing going on as in The Matrix. The photography rivals Orlando. Love the color effects, but it’s kinda gay that they come from a painting. Intersting that it was shot on…
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Eyes Wide Shut (1999)
Vintage Stanley. Photographic symmetry, grainy film, classical music over almost every scene, strange nightmarish environments, rampant nudity, Steadi-Cam, plain titles. We also get to see a touch of Kubrick’s Lolita-ish, Polanski-ish obsession with little girls with Sobieski, an almost prepubescent girl, dancing around in her undies (what does she whisper…
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The Sixth Sense (1999)
Touching. A few creepy moments, and a nice twist at the end. But who gets the sixth sense? Does everyone with the sixth sense have the same physical attributes? Is Cole simply a reincarnation of Vincent Gray? Are Cole’s scratchmarks self-inflicted after all? Osment is fantastic. Very creepy, very believable,…
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Hollywood Homicide (2003)
Shelton does another buddy film. Not sure that Ford is really a good actor. Cell phones just aren’t funny.
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Life of an American Fireman (1903)
Interesting editing at the end. Apparently, there were two versions, each showing different editing at the end.
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Nosferatu (1922)
Boring, but still more coherent than Bram Stoker’s Dracula. Definitely an eerie-looking Dracula.
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The Man Who Laughs (1928)
A pleasantly eerie story. Great performance by Veidt. A surprising (and refreshing) touch of nudity.
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Zero for Conduct (1933)
Zero for excitement. Aside from the introduction scene on the train, pretty boring and slow. The revolt isn’t really exciting because the authoritative power of the teachers wasn’t clearly established. I mean, they never even tried to teach the kids, they were just there. I wanted them to get thrown…
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Pride of the Yankees (1942)
Mildly interesting and touching, but a bit slow. If I wasn’t such a fan of baseball, the rating might have been lower. The “Play ball!” at the end was pretty cool. Really neat to see Babe Ruth in this movie.
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The Day the Earth Stood Still (1951)
Wise had a good sense of timing, but the movie seems a bit sterile (no art). The genius character (the alien) is obviously representative of Jesus. The movie is a little bit too pumped with political and religious messages for my taste. Good music. It may be time for a…
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Psycho (1998)
Like everyone else is asking, why was it made? There certainly wasn’t anything wrong with the original film’s place in film history. If they absolutely had to remake it, I would only wish that they had made it an artistic venture rather than the business venture it obviously was. Remaking…
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The Dirty Dozen (1967)
Probably the best OLD war movie. Good story, a lot happens, rather in-depth for an older movie. While most older war movies would have ended after they complete the training exercise, this one kept on going to show the best part, the war. Reminded me a lot of Full Metal…
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Fritz the Cat (1972)
It gets its rating for being different, like The Devils. It’s refreshing to see movies like this once in a while. Made by an NYU student (wouldn’t this have made a great thesis film?) who went on to direct feature films. Amazing. Amazingly political, with blatant and brave depictions of…
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Ceddo (1977)
Pretty long, pretty boring. A tolerable beginning, but once the music stops and the slow camera shots take over, I lost interest. The fast-paced disco soundtrack for the action was nice. Contains an interesting quote: “A dead man would be happy to accept what a sick man refuses.”
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Seems Like Old Times (1980)
Pretty funny, but not Chevy’s funniest. Good performances by Hawn and Grodin. It would have been great if the movie ended when Chevy was whistling and walking away from the camera. It felt like it should have ended there. The bit at the end was kinda dumb.
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Possibly in Michigan (1983)
Cute. Kind of a neat flavor. An anti-men musical with 80’s synthesized music.
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Commando (1985)
Entertaining and fun to watch. The action is a bit cheesy, but the story is good and the comedy is great. More action movies like this one should be made. Not all sensation, but a good story, good writing, and some real comedy on top of the action. Cameron has…
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Hoosiers (1986)
Nothing special. Why the title? Dumb ending. A lot of bad cuts which destroy the moods certain scenes establish. The same thing happened with the music, too. Nice 80’s synthesizer music. The blasting music in the credits was horrible. The sports footage is decent. Hopper was quirky, weird, very interesting,…
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The Big Picture (1989)
Interesting satire for those who know Hollywood. A few funny moments.
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sweetie (1989)
Very artistic, but I’m not sure how. It carried an eerie plotlessness throughout, and it remarkably conveyed emotion with the shallow plot it had. Some pretty funny and well-developed characters, and some really funny moments. And I could have sworn the Dad was Ted Williams.
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Misery (1990)
Good horror. Good characters. Good acting. Nice flavor. Great story. But why would she want the sheriff to stay at her house? Interesting film from a guy like Reiner. Also interesting that they wanted Warren Beatty for the lead. He probably would have done better than Caan. Everyone wants to…
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A Few Good Men (1992)
Courage Under Fire meets A Time To Kill. Pretty boring. The whole premise/comflict seems unimportant. A lot of talking, and it gets tiresome. Big cast. How many times has Cruise played the hot-headed military man/lawyer? He’s pretty much a young Paul Newman. Pollack’s pretty funny. I never thought Nicholson was…
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Calendar Girl (1993)
Can you say, “Banking off the lure of hot stars of television to make a few quick bucks off the poor, little teeny-boppers who don’t know how to distinguish a good movie from a load of shit?” My date for this one: Jill.
Full ReviewOrlando (1993)
One of the most beautifully shot films I have ever seen. Fantastic colors and great composition. Great use of sound and music. Marvelous set and costume design. Fabulous flavor. Has that same eerie flavor that The Devils has. The looking at the camera bits I didn’t like. I found them…
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The Client (1994)
This movie was cute, I guess, and also a little heart-warming. The story was pretty interesting. I can’t help feeling that something was missing in this movie. It could have been the monodirectional singular plot of the boy and his lawyer that didn’t have anything else in the movie to…
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Three Colors: Red (1994)
Nice flavor, beautifully shot. Some neat camera movements, nice colors, and cool lighting. Not surprisingly, red is used quite a bit. Cool intro, but I sure as Hell don’t get the ending. The girl was cute, especially with that crinkle in her forehead. Almost a cross between Elisabeth Shue and…
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I'm a photographer, web developer, travel enthusiast, and movie buff living in Alexandria, Virginia, USA.In the summer of 1993, I started writing reviews for every movie I saw and haven't looked back. I'm up to 2,363 reviews now. This makes me cool or a complete dork, depending on your perspective.
Some of these reviews contain spoilers, so if that bothers you, don't read!
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